Subversive Shit-To-Git

Aha! You were thinking I was trying to make a profit from this website, weren't you? I bet you thought "He's just trying to make a buck. What a fine hypocrite he is...What a fine anti-capitalist! He practices what he preaches."

Actually I do practice what I preach. To prove it, instead of selling the following slogans on T-shirts and bumper stickers and in tracts, I say you're welcome to use any of them for distribution. I thought of them and wrote 'em down and put 'em on this website but you can take 'em and go to Kinko's and have 'em put on a shirt, or have bumper stickers made somewhere, whatever.

Some of the sloges are too long for bumper stickers, so they'd be better on T-shirts.

You even have my permission to use any of the written material in this website in a tract. Go ahead, print it out and make copies in tract format then give them to church people, school kids, college students, loved ones, casual acquaintances, co-workers, anyone you want...

Some of the Bible commentaries would make great tracts for Xtians to read. The major problem with that though is actually getting them to read them! Good luck on that...I hope you figure out a better way than I ever have.

Enjoy all of my material! See, I have no intention of making one damn penny from this website. It's not about money; it's about opening eyes and minds.

Legal disclaimer: Sorry, but I will accept no liability for car bombings or vandalism by rabid Christians, or other acts of hostility by patriots (or even Christian patriots), or vengeful acts by others who might be pissed off by the following catchy slogans. I won't accept responsibility for any violence incurred by the following sloges. That includes shattered windshields, flying bullets, p.o.'ed NASCAR and Day-ull Earnhardt fans trying to run you over with their homemade race cars or Bible-thumpers thumping you on the head with their Bibles. Wear these t-shirts and drive with these bumper stickers at your own risk! Remember, some people have small minds and can't stand the pithy truth...

BUMPER STICKER & T-SHIRT IDEAS

ANTI-CHRISTIAN/ATHEIST

God Is In Rebellion Against Me

Jesus Who?

Hey Christian, Are You A BibleTick Or A JesusLeech? Either Way You're A Bloodsucker, A Soulsucker, And A Moneysucker!!

What Church Do I Go To? The Church of the Unholy Heathen and Unsanctified Brethren. Any More Dumb, Presumptuous Questions?

The Bible Is NOT Pro-family Or Pro-life...Go Back And Read It Again

God Isn't Real And Neither Is Jesus, So Get Out Of Your Little Fantasy World And Start Paying Attention To Reality.

What A Fiend We Have In Jesus...

Hey You! Yeah You, Christian! How Does It Feel To Be A Cult Member?

When You Pray You're Talking To Only One Person: Yourself

Who Made God? Who Made The God That Made God? Who Made The God Who Made The God Who Made God?

Hey Preacher! Why Don't You Get A REAL Job?

Belief In God Is Nonsense. Atheism Is Common Sense.

Who Created God? If You Say "Noone", I Can Say The Same Thing About Mother Nature.

What Would Jesus Do? He'd Maim, Slaughter And Destroy - That's What The Cruel Heartless Bastard Would Do! See The Book Of Revelation.

Got Jesus? No, Neither Do You, 'Cause Jesus Is A Myth!

Good Things Happen When You Read The Good Book. I Read The Bible And I Became An Atheist.

People Who Hate People Love Jesus.

Beware Of Preachers And Other Con Artists!

Christianity: Just Another Cult And The Biggest One Of All

Your Preacher Is A Dumbass.

Mythology + Psychology = Christianity

Who Wants To Worship A Serial Killer? Just Say No To Jesus.

The United States Is A Christian Nation? Well, That Explains Why It Sucks So Hard.

When I'm In The Mood For A Good Laugh, I Read The Bible.

End Religious Welfare Now! Fire Your Preacher And Make Him Pay Taxes

Christianity: A Curious Blend Of Mythology, Psychology and Mind Control, Commonly Mistaken As Truth

God Isn't Dead. He Was Never Alive.

Jesus: Crock Of Ages

Religion: An Unnecessary Evil

Christianity: A Rather Large Cult Led By Power-Hungry Money-Grubbing Charlatans Who Bamboozle Gullible Ignorant Hypocrites Who Don't Follow The Teachings Of Christ Who Would Never Go For The Religion Named After Him And Who Would Empty The Modern-Day Temples Of Their Moneychangers.

And Adam knew Eve, and she was good. And he fuckedst her. And she was pleased. And she cried unto heaven: "Oh yes, Adam! Yes!!!" Whereafter the serpent crawled into Eve, and she was pleased. Whereupon Adam became jealous and strangled the serpent. And Eve killed Adam in anger, for the serpent had given her much pleasure. Then Eve had noone, and she was very lonely, whereupon God, in his caring and mercy, created the dildo... --From The Book Of Chris, Chapter 666, verse 69

Judaism/Christianity/Islam: The Real Evil Axis, The Unholy Trinity

If You Want To Worship God, You Don't Need Church To Do So

We Were All Born Atheists. What Happened To You?

God Was Created In Man's Image, Not The Other Way Around.

Don't Believe Everything You Read (suggestion: insert artwork of Bible with circle around it with red diagonal line superimposed above Bible)

Christians: A Peculiar Class Of Ignoramuses Who Worship A Book

It's Wholly Babble, Not Holy Bible!

So You Think The Bible Is The Good Book, Eh? Now Go Read The Fine Print!

Sorry, Christians. There Was No First Coming So There Will Be No Second Coming!!

We Can Never Have World Peace As Long As Religion Is A Piece Of The World

Beware Of God

Watch Where You Step! The Wee Brains Of JesusLeeches Can Be Easily Misplaced. So Can The Tiny Minds Of BibleSlugs. Squish...

Smile - God Is Dead (suggestion: use artwork like that of the old "Smile! God Loves You!" signs in the 70s)

So You Believe In Jesus? Hey, I Have A Glacier For Sale In The Everglades!

Christianity In A Nutshell: Recycled Mythology Sustained To Control The Masses As Propaganda For Political Power Structures

With God All Things Are Possible? No. With All Things, God Is Impossible.

Hey Christian. Killed Any Unbelievers Lately? I Didn't Think So. Read Deuteronomy 13. If You Don't Follow ALL The Commands Of God, You're Not A Christian After All.

It's The Holy Bible Because It's Full Of Holes!

Who Would Jesus Do?

Christianity Is A Foul Disease, But It's Curable. The Cures Are A Dosage Of Common Sense, Some Straight Thinking, And A Little Comparative Religion.

Hey Christian. Sold All Your Possessions Yet? I Didn't Think So. Read Matthew 19. You Must Follow ALL The Commands Of God, Not Just The Ones You Pick And Choose. Otherwise You're Not A Christian. You Just Thought You Were.

I Live In SBL: ScaryBaptistLand, Also Known As Oklahoma.

Hey Preach! You're A Leech!! You're Sucking The Blood Of The Suckers Who Drop Money For Your Car Payment Every Sunday, And You're Suckling The Teats Of Our Religious Welfare System...

O Christian. Thou Shalt Repent Of Thy Hypocrisy.

When God Was Handing Out Brains, That Tim LaHaye Guy Got "Left Behind"!!

Hey Christian! Go Read Ezekiel 23, Buy Your Paddle, Move To The Desert, Take A Shit For God, And Don't Come Back.

Arise, And Think! And Be A Dumbass No More. (suggestion: Include artwork of an upside-down crucifix)

WWJD What Would Jesus Do? What Was Jesus Drinking? Who Would Jesus Do?... WWJW What Was Jesus Wearing?... What The Hell Was Jesus Thinking? What Time Of Day Did Jesus Wake Up? How Long Did Jesus Sleep? Who Was Jesus Doing? When Did He Do Them? How Long Did He Do Them? How Many Shekels Did He Do Them For? Did Jesus Do Mary Magdalene? Did He Wear A Condom? Why Does Jesus Kill So Many People In The Book Of Revelation? Why Does Jesus Send So Many People To Hell? Why Is Jesus So Insecure? Why Did Jesus Steal That Donkey? How Come He Didn't Return It To Its Owner? Why Did Jesus Kill All Those Poor Little Pigs With Demon Possession? Who Cut Jesus' Hair? Did The Motherfucker Ever Get A Haircut? Did He Ever Get A Trim Or A Style? Where Was Jesus In The Bible Between Age 12 And 30? When Did Jesus Take A Shit? Why Does Jesus Suck? How Many Ways Does Jesus Suck? Where Was Jesus' Barber? Where Did Jesus' Scissors Go? WDFJG Where Did Frickin' Jesus Go?... Who The Hell Is Jesus Anyway? How Will You Explain Yourself When Jesus Never Comes Back? WHY ARE YOU SO DAMN IGNORANT THAT YOU BELIEVE IN JESUS?!

ANTI-PATRIOTIC

America Was Founded By Illegal Aliens

The Roman Empire Fell. The Persian Empire Collapsed. So Too, Will The American Empire Crumble. And That Will Be A Great Day For The World.

The Few. The Proud. The Homicidal. The Marines.

The Right Is Wrong. The Radical Left Is Right.

The Floundering Fathers Created A Nation Of The (Rich) People, By The (Rich) People, And For The (Rich) People.

Any Country In Which 1 Percent Own 99 Percent Of The Wealth Cannot Be A Great Country. Case Closed.

Support The IRAQI Troops, In Their Defense Against A Home Invasion By The Big Bully Of The World.

We're the U.S. Marines. We Kill More People Before 9 AM Than Most People Do All Day.

Any Country That Has 2 Million Homeless People Cannot Be The Greatest Nation On Earth! Case Closed.

Pray For Our Troops. Pray They Will See The Light, Stop Swallowing The Propaganda, Quit Killing Innocent People, Realize They Are Doing The Wrong Thing, Then Come Home And Let Bush Fight His Own Damn War.

NASCAR: Nauseating Ass-Ugly Sports Cars Amusing Rednecks

Free Country My Ass! The U.S. Is A Corporate Fascist Dictatorship.

The United States Is NOT The Greatest Nation On Earth. It's Not Even In The Top 10!

Any Country With This Many Rednecks Is NOT The Greatest Nation On Earth.

They Found Saddam. But When Will Bush Be Captured?

NASCAR: Nearly As Stupid As Christians And Republicans

The Beast Called Bush Is Thirsty. It Drinks Oil And Blood.

I'm Not An American. I'm An Earthling.

GENERAL INTEREST

Fuck NASCAR. Fuck Dale Earnhardt. I'm Glad He's Dead. Another Dead Redneck. Cool. A Deadneck!

F.Y.G.H.FuckYour Goddamn Harley!

Life Is Too Short.
Don't Waste Time.
Don't Watch TV.
Interact With Other Humans.
Write a Book.
Read a Book - Every Day.
Learn.
Teach.
Don't Live Someone Else's Life.
Live Your Own Life.
Don't Watch a Sport.
Play a Sport.
Live.
FUCK "Friends."
FUCK "The Bachelor."
FUCK "Seinfeld."
FUCK "Joe Millionaire."
Fuck goddamn "Survivor".
Fuck fucking "American Idol".
Fuck TV.
Live Life.